My take on i-flex

Sometimes I get too frustrated with my company and then I do something like this.
This is my take on the high birth rate in i-flex.

Competition, Globalisation and Liberalisation has broadened our custom solutions capabilities.

As a company, we are committed to deliver solutions accustomed to suit the needs of the future.

Today, we proudly present - A milestone in Relationship Management

i-date - a futuristic dating service exclusive to the i-flex community.

The need : With a new-born in the company every week, we are growing extensively. In order to achieve greater efficiencies in financial services and operating costs, we have formulated a framework that will enable your children to network with children of fellow i-flexers.

During the next 15 years, i-date will help your children choose their partners based on various finance verticals and technologies creating core competence families.
This falls right within our policies for Continuity of Business.

Register today!!! Secure your child's future. Atleast you can be sure that you will have a Retail Grandson or a Corporate Grand-Daughter.

Embarassing Moment

A very fine morning, around 8.40 I guess and I was walking to office as usual. Its a good 10-15 minute walk from my apartment, along the Thames. The weather is around 4 to 5 degrees as usual. Then I cross the river on a footbridge and get into Jubilee Mall. Jubilee Mall is named after the Jubilee Line that's part of the Underground Network. This line opened in 1999 and so to keep commuters interested, they built a shopping mall around the station. I do window shopping. Its the most expensive place to shop in London, atleast to what I have seen. Ok, the Starbucks is manageable.

Coming to my story. I was walking in the mall towards office listening to Shankar Manadevan singing "kokku meena pudikkuma" from Kovil. I was about to take a left from Starbucks towards the escalator when a woman stopped me. She was looking for directions. Removing my earphones I waited for her question.

She: Do you where is Waitrose?
(Waitrose is a dept. store and can be compared to WalMart, FoodWorld etc.)
Me: (out of sheer enthusiasm to help someone who was lost) I'll show you. Will you come with me?
She: WHAT ???

Now I am sporting that Why-the-hell-is-she-asking-me-such-a-question look.

Me: (later, in my mind - oh my god, what did say. oh shit. i totally fucked up. shit shit shit.)
Me: (again)Oh I am so sorry. I am walking that way and if you dont mind, I can show you the way.
She: (a bit relieved I guess). Okay.

Then I walked towards my office and also showed her the way to the store.

Only then did I realise, what happened.

Just a few words here and here can make a such a lot of impact.
I remember one more incident like this that happened in the office. Not to me but. This one's hilarious. I'll reserve it for the next blog.

Furniture Design

Well, if you dont know, Netherlands is supposed to have the best design institutes in the world and the designers especially in ceramics, industrial and home design are supposed to be the best. Netherlands is also famous for another aspect - SEX.
So, when designers combine design skills and sex you get this.

The Libertine

The story of John Wilmot (Depp), a.k.a. the Earl of Rochester, a 17th century poet who famously drank and debauched his way to an early grave, only to earn posthumous critical acclaim for his life's work.

Depp's Movie Quotes

You've cut me down, I must confess; but in your mouth my balls must rest.

In my experience those who do not like you, fall into two categories; The Stupid and The Envious.

Ladies, an announcement. I am up for it, all the time.

Why Why Why?

why is tamil and gultu actor srikanth the most promising rather do-gooder character one can ever see on the silver screen. i still havent found out why its called silver screen.
so many movies that are portraying him as the "ulagatthulayae nalla payyan ivan thaan" character and it sux so much. first example is "oru naal oru kanavu" - what a pity. the way he drives the scooter, talks to girls rather drools i would say - i mean it was so senseless. and then being that i am the best son a mother can ever have type. haha. then this latest movie called "bambarakkannalae". thaanga mudiyala. again a "i am perfect man personified" role. i seriously dont know where all this is going. why cant films be very practical like most malayalam films? or atleast be a total start to finish commercial like the films our Vijay is doing. even though it doesnt make sense, its still a total commercial and it definitely rocks. this good-man for girls and mums image is ruthless and ridiculous.

Delhi Metro

I was reading an article, rather a set of articles published on India by the FORTUNE Magazine. And one was about the Delhi Metro. It was just a one page article, but I felt really good after reading it. What you and I saw in the movies all this while about people fighting against the corrupt politicians or the inefficient goverment. This feat is somewhat comparable to such themes. I still remember, i think, way back in 2002 when I was making a trip to Pilani, I saw these huge structures on the road and I was told that its part of the Metro Activities. Now, all this has happened only because of the hardwork of this 73 year old Sreedharan, a retired Railway Engineer, a PadmaShri recipient and TIME Magazine's Asia Man of the Year. So what was so special in this project - Sreedharan was allowed to choose his own team with a fair degree of autonomy and financial powers. More than 80% of contractors were paid for the jobs they did within 2 days of producing a bill. Sreedharan was promised minimum inteference from the goverment and mind you, all that happened and the project was finished in record time. The budget never bounced because if it did, then that would cost the Rail Company atleast 20 Million INR, everyday i guess.
In this rate, I am sure a number of heavy duty projects can be executed in India with no barrier for the success.

Corporate IT Strategy

NRI's from America - pls konjam adangu!!!

"Wanted bride for green card holder. Girl should be fair, slim, tall and H-1B visa holder."
This, in sum, is the new-age matrimonial ad being taken out by an increasing number of US-based NRIs.
It’s a need born out of compulsion. Green card holders, until now the most sought-after grooms in the marriage market, are increasingly finding brides hard to come by.
For, thanks to US immigration laws, it is difficult for them to take their brides home—if they do not come packaged with an H1B of their own—and parents are averse to keeping the bride at home and risking longterm abandonment.
There have been many cases of brides being left behind for five years or longer as a visa could not be processed because she is dependent on her husband’s green card. "
It is getting difficult to find matches for men with green cards.
No parent wants to risk keeping the bride at home as the groom cannot take her with him. Girls’ parents are all asking for more stable matches," said D V Koti Reddy, who runs a marriage bureau in Banjara Hills. And so, out-of-demand green card holders are searching for girls with credentials enough to get themselves an H-1B that will guarantee her entry into the US— with or without a husband.
A person can stay in the US for six years on an H-1B visa and in the meantime apply for a green card—which takes up to five years to process.
If not an H-1B visa holder, the green card hordes are also looking for girls with F-1 or student visas, who can be taken to the far shore in a shorter time.
Or they have the option of looking for someone with a K-visa, or fiance visa. If the girl’s parents are willing, the marriage takes place in the US instead of India. The engaged couple can enter the US with the girl carrying the K-1 visa and marry within 90 days. After the wedding, they can apply for a green card. But most girls’ parents are averse to the idea of sending their daughter to the US with a stranger without getting them married first, said a marriage consultant.
So, if green card holder is not no. 1, who is? For girls the best bet is someone who is working on an H-1B, but is already a year or so into processing his green card. This will enable the girl to go to the US on an H-4 visa as a dependent on a H-1B.

Shopping

We can spend perfect days shopping together. I promise I'll walk in and out of all the 47 Shoe Shops on Oxford Street even if you dont buy a pair at the end of the day.

Turner Brown

A skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this BIG African American guy standing next to him.

The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says: "7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pound lefttesticle, 3 pound right testicle, Turner Brown."

The small man faints straight away and falls to the floor. The big guy kneels down and brings him to by shaking him.

The big fellow says, What's wrong with you?" In a weak voice the little guy says, "What EXACTLY did you say to me?"

The big dude says, "I saw the curious look and figured I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me. I'm 7 feet. I weigh 350 pounds, Ihave a 20 inch penis, my left testicle weighs 3 pounds, my right testicle weighs 3 pounds and my name is Turner Brown."

The small guy says, "Turner Brown? Thank God! I thought you said "Turn Around."

Wow!!

I am totally lost and I wouldnt know what to do in this world.
Simply because - Without you, I'm as lonely as an abandoned dog on the side of a highway.

Do you?

Do you really need to be creative to write a blog?
Atleast I know what you should be or rather have.
- Good co-ordination between the mind and the keyboard so that you type out all that you have in your mind at once and if not this, then
- lots n lots of vetti time out of work or study in which case you can take your own time to write whatever you want.
anyways... after an unhealthy weekend, i decided to write my vows.
keeps me interested about something heavenly.

Have you heard of Balut?

A delicacy of Southeast Asia and especially the Philippines, a balut is a fertilized duck egg with a nearly-developed embryo inside that is boiled and eaten in the shell. Popularly believed to be an aphrodisiac and considered a hearty snack, balut are mostly sold by street vendors at night. Their high protein content is complimentary to the consumption of beer. The word balut roughly translates to mean "wrapped".
Balut are most often eaten with a pinch of salt, though some balut-eaters prefer chili and vinegar to complement their egg. The eggs are savored for their harmony of textures and flavors; the broth surrounding the embryo is sipped from the egg before the shell is peeled and the yolk and young chick inside can be eaten. All of the contents of the egg are consumed with the exception of a hard white chunk (the bato or "rock") that is found in the bottom of the egg. Balut have recently entered higher cuisine by being served as appetizers in restaurants: cooked adobo style, fried in omelettes or even used as filling in baked pastries.
Balut-making is not native to the Philippines. A similar preparation is known in China as maodan (Chinese: 毛蛋; pinyin: máodàn; literally "hairy egg"), and Chinese traders and migrants are said to have brought the idea of eating fertilized duck eggs to the Philippines. However, the knowledge and craft of balut-making has been localized by the balut-makers (mangbabalut). Today, balut production has not been mechanized in favor of the traditional production by hand. Although balut are produced throughout the Philippines, balut-makers in Pateros are renowned for their careful selection and incubation of the eggs.
Fertilized duck eggs are kept warm in the sun and stored in baskets to retain warmth. After nine days, the eggs are held to a light to reveal the zygote inside. Approximately eight days later the balut are ready to be cooked, sold, and eaten. Vendors sell cooked balut out of buckets of sand, used to retain warmth, and are accompanied by small packets of salt. Uncooked balut are rarely sold in Southeast Asia. In the United States, many Asian markets occasionally carry uncooked balut eggs, though their demand in North America is not very great. The cooking process is identical to that of hard-boiled chicken eggs, but the eggs are enjoyed while still warm.
Duck eggs that are not properly developed after nine to twelve days are sold as penoy, which look, smell and taste similar to a regular hard-boiled egg. These are occasionally beaten and fried, similar to scrambled eggs, and served with a vinegar dip.
The age of the egg before it can be cooked is a matter of colloquial preference. In the Philippines, the perfect balut is 17 days old, at which point it is said to be balut sa puti ("wrapped in white"). The chick inside is not old enough to show its beak, feathers or claws and the bones are undeveloped. The Vietnamese prefer their balut matured from 19 days up to 21 days, when the chick is old enough to be recognizable as a baby duck and has bones that will be firm but tender when cooked

Thursday the 10 Nov

im too lazy to do this. but this is my attempt to create a blog. lets see how it goes.